“Not in a million years,” Ninja Tbeory’s version of Dante quips, in a gag referencing a dismissive statement parroted by Game Journalists when condensing the fan reaction to DmC. “They just don’t like his hair,” they mused, evading each and every legit criticism of the new direction as if going for that SSS ranking. ‘Donte’, in his first battle sequence, gets a wig planted on his head resembling the real Dante’s anime-ish hair. “Not in a million years,” he said. Cute.
Well it seems I was right to delay this part of the series until after Bungie formally revealed the big Sept. expansion, Forsaken. There’s a lot to cover about the actual reveal stream, particularly the hilariously awkward and confusing explanation of the Annual Pass (a fancy named Season Pass). But in keeping with the point of this little blog series, I’m only covering what’s in the graphic Bungie updated the day of the reveal. So let’s dive in.
Destiny 2, the game a Kotaku writer describes in increasingly witty ways, is on its final stretch before the inevitable Sept. DLC expansion – the annual drop that’s often larger than usual (ie The Taken King, Rise of Iron). It’s a big deal, is what I’m sayin. But I don’t have any info on it other than rumor that it will revolve around the Awoken, everybody’s favorite space dark elves. This entry here? Oh I’m gonna muse about the remaining unchecked boxes on Bungie’s Destiny 2 Roadmap, hereby known as The Apology Tour. I can’t promise I’ll have deep thoughts on each bullet point but that’s only because I don’t pretend to care about every facet of the game. I’m a PvP guy, see?
Bungie, developers of such greats hits such as Nerf Shotties To Oblivion (a trilogy), Design CQC Spaces And Punish Players For Adapting To Them, and Popular Weapons Are Bad; are probably right now taking in the current discussions about the PvP meta of Destiny 2. Mind you some of the biggest changes to our Guardians’ kit, including subclass paths turned into ‘two characters’ a subclass, were almost exclusively made in response to Destiny 1’s PvP. I bring this up because right now I’m seeing certain discussions in Destiny forums that are consistent enough to reach Bungie’s ears (please remember, with Bungie it’s often not the strength of the case, it’s how loud and often they hear it). And there are many concerning things people are talking about with a straight face, but the biggest cringe for me is… the vilification of ‘Team Shooting’. Let’s talk about things, shall we?
There’s too many of them, bro!
Hey guys, my name is Jean Kalyx (triaD!). I’m a writer of fantastically exciting things, a commentator of social silliness, an ambitiously aspiring game designer, a rigorous competitive gamer, an opposer of ideological sophistry, a lover of pizza, and a- OH MY GOD I’M BLACK!
Watch superhero movies drunk. Become worthy.
So Ashley Valazquez of Not Your Mama’s Gamer, a feminist gaming blog, wrote an odd poem of sorts lamenting the fact that Lara Croft – a Tomb Raider – is fit enough to have a thigh gap. While she’s obviously having a bit more fun with it than the usual diatribes about this sort of thing, I still found it telling enough to wanna respond to it by way of translation. I’m going to break down each passage for you so we may gaze into the mind of somebody who plays games and ends up reflecting on their body. In poetry.
I also wanna preface this by stating I do not like the new Lara Croft. She’s ironically designed to cater to people like Ashley while abandoning the gameplay oriented elements of the actually good Tomb Raider Legend reboot. So keep this in mind.
The real Lara Croft, far as I’m concerned. (Legend, 2006)
Update: You may consider this my swan song of my participation in the ongoing games media ethics and culture movement that is #GamerGate. I have a new initiative that I will elaborate on in the future called Return To Gaming (#ReturnToGaming). As it were.
A fine chap, Sean Morrison offered a list of questions for people who support GamerGate. Sean is a journalist and all around decent guy who ventured out to hear the voices of people who make up the movement, and that included voices you may not be familiar. I figured this is the closest thing to being heard and I appreciated the outreach. While he will be compiling the responses in a future piece of his own, he also gave his blessing in posting my full response on this very blog. Because he’s nice, you get it!? Hit the jumpity-jump for my full response to see where I am with GamerGate. He has some interesting questions and I hope to have a two-way with him in a public, real-time way someday.
The trailer for Amazing Spider-Man 2 came out, and it looks great. But this blog isn’t a screencap rundown or a trailer review, because we got those all over the place. Nay, I want to address something that segues into something bigger that itself hints at something grander. Something, something, ya know? You know. You don’t? Well let’s start knowing, dammit! Today’s discussion is about the fan reaction to the trailer, fan bias/hypocrisy, and most importantly something I’m going to call “Super Cynicism”. First, the epic trailer in question:
Hey you! Glad you’re here and I’m sorry I don’t update more often. I do have a few ideas for blog posts including one focused on Bungie’s Destiny, Ubisoft’s The Division, and R*’s GTA Online – and why ‘MMOs’ of this type are awesome and entirely welcome. But for now, Microsoft released an “infographic” telling why their Cloud backup is the bizz-nezz. As some of you know I don’t react well to buzz words and flowery speak that publishers and other companies do to sell their products. And things like this, as ignorable as they are, is the sort of fodder that drives console fanboys to cite when defending their favorite toy. While console fanboy wars is the subject of yet another blog we’re just gonna run through this thing and break it down.
…Because I’m bored and so are you.
Employees get to feel special for about a year before this goes public.
In the last few gaming generations a special designation for high budget, tentpole games rose in the industry. They are called AAA Games. In my day they were merely called ‘Killer Apps’, or system sellers that were often exclusive and bleeding production quality. Now they’re multiplatform, marketed during Super Bowls and Playoffs, and more than likely have Steve Blum in there somewhere. They are also shallow, built by committee, aims to satisfy everyone while appealing to no one demographic anyway. They are cookie cutter, expensive, and do little more than sell some gaming engine’s brand. They also sale like pancakes regardless of homogenized quality. Microsoft, ever the innovator, took these ingredients and decided to make a console. The first AAA console is then appropriately called, the Xbox One. Let’s begin.
Finally, a console for people with no exclusive interests in anything.